If a child lives with criticism,
he learns to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility,
he learns to fight.
If a child lives with fear,
he learns to be apprehensive.
If a child lives with pity,
he learns to feel sorry for himself.
If a child lives with ridicule,
he learns to be shy.
If a child lives with jealousy,
he learns what envy is.
If a child lives with shame,
he learns to feel guilty.
If a child lives with encouragement,
he learns to be confident.
If a child lives with tolerance,
he learns to be patient.
If a child lives with praise,
he learns to be appreciative.
If a child lives with acceptance,
he learns to love.
If a child lives with approval,
he learns to like himself.
If a child lives with recognition,
he learns that it is good to have a goal.
If a child lives with sharing,
he learns about generosity.
If a child lives with honesty and fairness,
he learns what truth and justice are.
If a child lives with security,
he learns to have faith in himself and in those about him.
If a child lives with friendliness,
he learns that the world is a nice place in which to live.
If you live with serenity,
your child will live with peace of mind.
With what is your child living?
Lets look at helping our children live with approval. So many people feel that they are not good enough.
Here is an experiment. State out loud, declare “I am a great mother” or ” I am a great wife”. Was that difficult? If yes then you need to believe in yourself more. A confident parent is more likely to raise more confident children. It’s an unspoken vibe some children pick up.
Now Ask your child to state that they are good at things you know they are good at. You may find as they get older its harder for them to state that they are good at things. The system we live in gradually diminishes children self confidence. They are full of enthusiasm, confidence and creativity when small, healthily boasting at all the things they can do, free of inhibitions and gradually it gets reduced. Peer pressure, competitiveness, expectations in educations systems chip away at their confidence. We must work hard to help them preserve it.
What can we do?
Imagine a sign on everybody’s forehead saying “Make me feel important”. Even on your spouses and manager’s forehead. I’m sure you can figure out what you can do to make that person feel important.
I’d love to hear what you come up with?